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The Story Must Be Told

103. Goodnight My Love 1 - Guest Preacher Marcus Parks, featuring Jackie Zebrowski - The Story Must Be Told

103. Goodnight My Love 1 - Guest Preacher Marcus Parks, featuring Jackie Zebrowski

Released on 12/29/2020

Goodnight My Love is now on sale as a novella: https://a.co/d/33wdnvx We are taking a week off and sharing this recent Story so you might be fresh and PREPARED for the next two parts coming out in the new year. Marcus and Jackie will be returning for parts 2 and 3 of Goodnight My Love. *** When parasites fill your abdomen, take a deep breath, see your primary care provider, and ENJOY it. As a new host, try to name your new parasites with care. Welcome to the beautiful new you. Guest Preacher: Marcus Parks (Last Podcast on the Left, No Dogs in Space) Featuring: Jackie Zebrowski (Page 7 podcast, IG: @jackthatworm) Invocation Petitions for Worthy Congregants Story: “Goodnight My Love” Template for Leaving Your Family Merch, for Hosts: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt Patreon, for Parasites: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt
117. The Adventures Of Chalmsberry Grib - The Story Must Be Told

117. The Adventures Of Chalmsberry Grib

Released on 12/16/2020

Mark Twain's mummified corpse spins somewhere in a shallow grave fulla dirt n worms heh heh yeah you better BELIEVE. Chalmsberry Grib could palm Tom Sawyer like a basketball and dunk that skull until it was CHUNKS. Yeah, Chalmsberry Grib, you tricky tot, tell us: where did you come from? Hour 22 of the 522 Hour Story Fund-a-thon Donations Honest (www.patreon.com/tsmbt) Liturgical Reading: “The Adventures of Chalmsberry Grib” The Fund-a-thon Continues Stop what you're doing and CHUNK DOWN on our first ever book of poetry, fresh fresh. Over 70 psalms to delight thee, and illustrations gooey enough to clog a windpipe. We set our site to redirect to the curséd Amazon page, lo www.thestorymustbetold.com Merch for Aunt Plusies: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt Patreon for Disemstoried Souls: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt
116. Fax Cover Sheet - The Story Must Be Told

116. Fax Cover Sheet

Released on 12/02/2020

The Story snuck into your bedroom in the middle of the night and removed something you love. Will you notice what it took? Or will you pretend not to? It’s more comfortable to be a Story coward than a Story hero. I bet YOU could tell us allllll about that. Invocation Psalm: “Chromosome Dance” Liturgical Reading: “Fax Cover Sheet” Concluding Prayer We have a Story-darn book of gooey poetry out NOW for your humble eyes and palms. Over 70 psalms, a dozen healthy illustrations, and the BALLAD OF PREPSA in print for the first time. We set our site to redirect to the curséd Amazon page, lo www.thestorymustbetold.com Merch for Characters: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt Patreon for Authors: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt
115. The Voluntary Heart - The Story Must Be Told

115. The Voluntary Heart

Released on 11/17/2020

I got an arrhythmia and it starts with an S, and ends with a TORY. YEAH. My heart beats for the STORY, thump thump. Oooh, and if you open up your ears real wide, it’ll thump in you, too, tee hee. Cro-Croa Daytime Liturgical Reading: “The Voluntary Heart” Cro-Croa PM Thump thump, congregants, we’ll thump ya again in two thumps of the week’s thump. Merch for Daytime: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt Patreon for PM: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt Ooh and some extra special merch coming soooooooon wink wink.
114. The Book of Keith - Guest Preacher Danny Tamberelli - The Story Must Be Told

114. The Book of Keith - Guest Preacher Danny Tamberelli

Released on 11/06/2020

Child transformation! Spooky, scary. Boys becoming scaly, dads becoming sad. Enjoy the first Story channeled through our scabby assistant groundskeeper, Devon. The service to this glorious Story was crafted in conjunction with humble patron and VIP Story Glory Guard Congregant Dakota V! The Story’s gonna getchya, heh heh. Our Virtuous Guest Preacher: Danny Tamberelli (The Adventures of Danny and Mike podcast, Insta @dannytamberelli) Story Housecalls Invocation Psalm: “The Dogs of Marital Success” Liturgical Reading: “The Book of Keith” Mariba’s Gift Next service is in two weeks, heh heh. Merch for CROCS: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt Patreon for GATORS: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt
113. A Guided Meditation - The Story Must Be Told

113. A Guided Meditation

Released on 10/21/2020

Shhhh, breathe in. Breathe out. Keep breathing out. Out! OUT! I did NOT say “in.” OUT. Today, we calm it down, grease it up, and relax our minds into a state of responsive, ready terror. Breathe with us—and keep them pearly winkers SHUT. Story retreat Bonfire Liturgical Reading: “A Guided Meditation” Concluding Remarks In two weeks we’ll grease you up again, mm mmm Merch for THINKERS: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt Patreon for STINKERS: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt
112. Lil Sips - The Story Must Be Told

112. Lil Sips

Released on 10/06/2020

Hark! Praise! Today is Greasegiving! What a HOLY DAY. Today we learn every Truth, and witness the Greatest Story Of All Time. We honor Devon, for some reason. Also: there’s a psalm. Invocation Petitions for Glorious Congregants Psalm: “Lil Sips” Liturgical Reading: The Story of Revelation FEATURING Every Answer Ever Concluding Remarks Solos improvised by Al Piela https://alpiela.com/ We’ll see you in two weeks FRESH Merch for CHUGS: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt Patreon for SIPS: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt
111. Are You Afraid of the Story: Aliens - The Story Must Be Told

111. Are You Afraid of the Story: Aliens

Released on 09/08/2020

It’s late, and a sweet lil Devon had another nightmare. Sounds like it’s time for some STORY. Cuddle up, wriggle your toes, and prepare yourself for three tales with the UTMOST loose connective tissue. Talkin’ ALIENS. YES. Matching Pajamas Liturgical Readings: “Chunk Riots” “The Pee Room” “Spooky Aliens!” Goodnight The Story is taking a well-deserved break. We will return with a new Story October 6th. There’s still a 522 Club next week for patreons! Merch for YOU: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt Patreon for YOU AS WELL: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt
110. And America Makes Two! - The Story Must Be Told

110. And America Makes Two!

Released on 08/25/2020

Ameri-come one and all, to the rootinest tootinest Story this here Story mouth ever done Storied. You better bet your ASS that Tim Allen pops up in this wild hogride. That’s just what happens when you AMERICA. Heartfelt Sentiments An Unwelcome Guest Liturgical Reading: “And America Makes Two!” A Welcome Guest Tuck your hand between your pits, clamp down, and tug. That’s how you salute THE STORY. Merch for Americans*: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt Patreon for REAL Americans*: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt *or non-Americans. If you got cheddar, we ain’t stoppin’ no one, nuh uh
109. The Grief Market - Guest Preacher Jackie Zebrowski - The Story Must Be Told

109. The Grief Market - Guest Preacher Jackie Zebrowski

Released on 08/11/2020

You’ll never miss no one as much as you miss CELEBRITY. CELEBRITY is how you know what it means to live. No one alive is happier than CELEBRITY—so when they die it’s a-mournin’ time, heh heh. HONK HONK, GRIEF GRIEF. Guest Preacher: Jackie Zebrowski (Page 7 Podcast, @jackthatworm on Instagram) Invocation Petitions for Dutiful Congregants Liturgical Reading: “The Grief Market” Concluding Prayer In two weeks we can stew again in the hot flavors of STORY. Merch so HOT: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt Patreon so SENSUAL: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt
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