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Episodes
125. The Age of Wind Power - Guest Chaplain Jackie Zebrowski
37 min
|
Apr 28, 2021
Every whale sings a song, and it goes like this:
“Ohhh
Oh noooo
Don’t take my oiiiil”
But who pays attention to lyrics? If a whale sang me anything, I wouldn’t hear a word over the crackle of WHALE OIL.
This week’s service is sponsored by Mark O. O! might grease be spread upon thee.
Guest Chaplain: Jackie Zebrowski (Page 7 podcast, IG: @jackthatworm)
Invocation
Mark O’s Psalm So True
Story: “The Age of Wind Power: a Brief History of the Origins of the Empire’s Second Industrial Revolution”
Sneak Preview from the Story Children’s Choir
Come back in two weeks or it’ll happen to YOU.
Our first book of PSALMS:
www.thestorymustbetold.com
MERCH YES: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt
PATREON PLEASE: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt
37 min
124. You're Gonna Touch My Hand
32 min
|
Apr 13, 2021
Pleasure is hiding! PEEKABOO. Ohhh you have to SEEK pleasure. Search, and be warned: you will not find IT. IT will find YOU. When the Stranger appears from the alley and removes their glove, what will be waiting to tick-tick-tickle ya? A hand can be many things, even: fear itself.
Invocation
Psalm: More We Tolerate
Story: “You’re Gonna Touch My Hand”
Concluding Prayer
After you’re absorbed into your new life, come back in two weeks for a new Story, ya goof!
Our first book of PSALMS:
www.thestorymustbetold.com
MERCH for gloves: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt
PATREON for hands: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt
32 min
123. More More More More MORE Stories
24 min
|
Mar 30, 2021
Remember: Purkley Katzman was ground up by a bunch of gears. It was his own dang fault for not being gear-proof. Today, we share some of Purkley’s stupid, STUPID Stories, so we might remember: he got ground up by a bunch of gears.
Invocation
Psalm: Fuck You, Purkley
Story: “More More More More MORE Stories”
Concluding Prayer
Come back in two weeks and we’ll all forget Purkley Katzman was ever alive, let alone ground up by a bunch of gears.
Our first book of PSALMS:
www.thestorymustbetold.com
More MERCH: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt
More MORE PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt
24 min
122. Goodbye Pork Pie Hat
34 min
|
Mar 16, 2021
Everybody’s working for the Story. Everybody’s working despite the Story. Everybody’s working because of the Story. The Story will strip you of meaning like a business sheds insurance coverage.
Invocation
Psalm: Pigs Aren’t Real
Story: “Goodbye Pork Pie Hat”
Concluding Prayer
The Story is back in two weeks with something fresh for you to enjoy sip sip.
Our first book of PSALMS:
www.thestorymustbetold.com
MERCH honest: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt
PATREON juicy: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt
34 min
Trailer: Welcome to the Story!
5 min
|
Mar 15, 2021
Welcome to our Church, our soon-to-be congregant. Are you familiar with our institution? Do you know the works of the Story? Are you looking to convert someone who the Story has so far denied? Listen to this "trailer," and perhaps enjoy the featured episodes:
77. After the Attack
45. It's My Right
60. They Made a Strange Love - Guest Preacher Joe Pera
The Story's gonna getcha, haha.
5 min
BONUS: The 522 Club Clip Show!
28 min
|
Mar 9, 2021
The Story Must Be delayed a week, dear congregant. Shh, shhh, dry your eyes, child, for we put together a special treat to help you pass the time! Our faithful patrons selected their favorite chunks of our patreon exclusive podcast: the 522 Club. We have compiled them here for YOU. Listen down and CHUNK UP.
Our first book of PSALMS:
www.thestorymustbetold.com
MERCH true: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt
PATREON fresh: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt
28 min
121. It Was A Saturday ...
34 min
|
Feb 23, 2021
Here is the Story! Don’t get distracted! Not like I did at Taddy’s wedding, when the horse got loose. You see, a horse must learn every lesson with one eye then the other. Myself, I’ve always been left-eyed. Now, my uncle was right-eyed, but this was because of an incident at a barbecue with a long fork. Forks of over 5 inches in length should be classified as weapons, unless a person’s arm is so short that long utensils are not objects of violence, but convenience. I haven’t measured my arms for over a month now.
Invocation
Petitions for Honorable Congregants
Liturgical Reading: “It Was A Saturday Morning When Arthur Kurtz Came To The Terrible Realization The Day's Obligations Were Far More Complicated Than Anticipated”
Concluding Prayer
Our first book of PSALMS:
www.thestorymustbetold.com
A lil bit of MERCH: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt
A healthy glop of PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt
34 min
120. Immortal Forgotten Words
33 min
|
Feb 9, 2021
VRRRRRRROOOOOWWW here comes the plane beep beep open wide. Let the Story be your words, your every thought. Open your mouth wide, the Story’s gonna land inside VRRRREOOOOOWWWW
Invocation
Psalm: “Plane Peepin’”
Liturgical Reading: “Immortal, Forgotten Words”
Concluding Prayer
Our first book of PSALMS:
www.thestorymustbetold.com
Merch VRRRROOOOOOOAA: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt
Patreon VRRRRROOOOOOOOWWW: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt
33 min
119. Goodnight My Love 3 - Guest Chaplain Jackie Zebrowski, Featuring Marcus Parks
45 min
|
Jan 27, 2021
Goodnight My Love is now on sale as a novella: https://a.co/d/33wdnvx
Come to my chest, sweet TOT, and suckle at my plastic feeding port. You can tell how much I love you by how calmly I wince. Shh shh shh, if that mockingbird don't sing, papa's gonna buy you some gasoline.
Guest Chaplain: Jackie Zebrowski (Page 7 podcast, IG: @jackthatworm)
Featuring: Marcus Parks (Last Podcast on the Left, No Dogs in Space)
Invocation
Psalm: “Meat-a-ball”
Liturgical Reading: “Goodnight My Love part 3”
Concluding Prayer
Our first book of PSALMS:
www.thestorymustbetold.com
Merch healthy: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt
Patreon juicy: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt
45 min
118. Goodnight My Love 2 - Guest Preacher Marcus Parks, Featuring Jackie Zebrowski
40 min
|
Jan 12, 2021
Goodnight My Love is now on sale as a novella: https://a.co/d/33wdnvx
We’ve been smelling fennel for weeks, and sure enough it’s because there’s MORE. Marcus caught the sniff, and Jackie too, you bet. Sniff along, and just see what ends up inside you, ya goof.
Guest Preacher: Marcus Parks (Last Podcast on the Left, No Dogs in Space)
Featuring: Jackie Zebrowski (Page 7 podcast, IG: @jackthatworm)
Invocation
The Feast of Saint Brandon
Liturgical Reading: “Goodnight My Love 2”
Concluding Prayer
The conclusion to Good Night My Love is coming in two weeks oh fresh fresh.
Our first book of PSALMS: www.thestorymustbetold.com
Merch for YOU: https://topatoco.com/collections/tsmbt
Patreon for ALSO YOU: https://www.patreon.com/tsmbt
40 min
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