PODCAST
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58. New York City Girl
Released on 03/05/2019
Tee hee hee, the Story has a Story planned for you. Rough mornings, rude meetings, bad days, and rotten weeks, the Story has orchestrated each and every one. Ask yourself: why does the Story demand such punishment? Will it ever relent? Then answer yourself with a giddy, shrieking: NO.
Invocation
Psalm: “Rocks, Rocks, Rocks”
Liturgical Reading: “New York City Girl”
The Secret Words of the Story
Next week, oh next week, the Story will replace us again, and goo us up with unruly truth.
57. The Bear Musician - Guest Preacher Marcus Parks
Released on 03/01/2019
The Story sloshed over the rim of the Story cup, and did spill one fresh for you. In this special bonus service, we witness a young Bruno, and his cowardice before the agony of Story. This Story originally appeared in "Creepypasta XIII: A Meat's Dream" on Last Podcast on the Left. We relive this Story—sup upon its eager drips!
Guest Preacher: Marcus Parks (Last Podcast on the Left, Page 7)
Invocation
Psalm: “Check the Trunk”
Liturgical Reading: “The Bear Musician”
Concluding Prayer
Enjoy this special treat of Story pure. We return on Tuesday with your regularly scheduled service, sweet sweet.
56. More More More More More More More Short Stories
Released on 02/26/2019
These stories are like the screams from Purkley Katzman's gnashing mouth as the gears did their work upon him: short, savory, juice-juicy. We honor stories both short and long, but today we hold a special place for those truths that punish the ear quickly. Sup upon each, and yearn! Yearn!
Invocation
Psalm: “I'm a Gym Teacher”
Liturgical Reading: “More More More More More More More Short Stories”
Concluding Prayer
The Story is ripe, and we chew it up and honk it down. Honk one with us next week as well, ooh ooh.
55. Ghosts Are Hazy Life
Released on 02/19/2019
Life is a spectrum, full of mushy inbetweens only alive enough to know pain. Not everything which is dead was once alive, but all that lives, however minutely, does perish. Ha! Haha! The Story teaches us even full life is but half life, and half life is but a web of memories disappearing. Squint and you can see it, but how easily it is brushed to threads. So the Story sayeth: ooooooOOooooohhhhh.
Invocation
Psalm: “The Agony Table”
Liturgical Reading: “Ghosts Are Hazy Life”
Concluding Prayer
Truths abound, Stories enflamed, we love the Story, we speak Its name. See your fresh greases next week squish squish.
54. Heart Of Worms
Released on 02/12/2019
Say goodbye to who you used to be, because the Story will replace your eyes, your mind, and your heart. O Story! Hollow me out, dump the refuse in the shitter, and fill me up with the ignorant stranger of Story. I don’t want to recognize my family, nor my dog. But I will always recognize the Story—obedient and eternal.
Invocation
Psalm: “Come Get Your Casserole”
Liturgical Reading: “Heart of Worms”
Concluding Prayer
Next week, oh next week, the Story will replace us again, and goo us up with unruly truth.
53. The Wind
Released on 02/05/2019
Wooosh wooosh that’s the wind and it says, “I’m gonna getcha.” Oh, that nasty wind, always blowing foul tidings down our chimney, stirring ashes and breaking branches. Today, we read a Story about such a wind, and bow our heads in contrition so that it does not visit us.
Invocation
Psalm: “Seven Roys”
Liturgical Reading: “The Wind”
Concluding Prayer
Next week we will return with a Story true, hearts a-bursting, bowels a-rattling.
52. The House Of Crispo Part 2
Released on 01/29/2019
Brother Reid has recovered, though his mind is scrambled like a blood egg. He returns to finish the Story, and gulp of the Story’s fine juices. Boys grow disobedient, but the Story rectifies all trespasses through the purifying agony of Story. Story!
Invocation
Liturgical Reading: “The House of Crispo Part 2”
Concluding Prayer
We love you and enjoy your presence. Join us again next Tuesday, perhaps on Spotify if you’re naughty heh heh.
51. The House Of Crispo Part 1
Released on 01/22/2019
Cherish the disobedient child. Cherish their ignorance. For only the rude and stupid can be enveloped into the heart of the Story. It is our duty to bring new, empty minds to the Story, to our homes, so it may fill them with the light of Story. Oh Story! May we harvest a human crop for you.
Invocation
Psalm: “The Light of the Father”
Liturgical Reading: “The House of Crispo Part 1”
Concluding Prayer
Next Tuesday we return. Next Tuesday, we finish this.
Check out our new short film, “The Dog the Boy”
https://vimeo.com/226796022
Or see it as part of a live TSMBT service:
https://vimeo.com/297286015
50. The Son Of God Dies from Multiple Stab Wounds
Released on 01/15/2019
I’ll make you my son if you don’t behave, and you won’t like what happens to my sons. Ohh they do ALL of daddy’s chores, and of mommy they must anoint. It’s a threat, and it’s TRUE, whether you are mother, aunt, or nephew, you’ll all suffer as sons. This Story is a testament to how easily a son is named and exchanged, and how all sons grow inconvenienced on the turbulent winds of discourse.
Invocation
Psalm: “Anointed in Yoghurt”
Liturgical Reading: “The Son of God Dies from Multiple Stab Wounds”
Concluding Prayer
Next Tuesday is a day for treats, as the Story is once again gooily invoked.
Check out our new short film, “The Dog the Boy”
https://vimeo.com/226796022
Or see it as part of a live TSMBT service:
https://vimeo.com/297286015
49. Farm Fresh - Guest Preacher Jared Logan
Released on 01/08/2019
The uterus should be called “the Story box” because it is where all our Stories begin! Nothing invigorates the Story like the squeals of an infant in the wet folds of a mother, or better yet, two infants, or three or four! Today, we hear the Story of a man who becomes mother, whose Story box writhed with Stories blessed.
Guest Preacher: Jared Logan (@JaredLogan)
Invocation
Psalm: “Cornshit”
Liturgical Reading: “Farm Fresh”
Concluding Prayer
Hoo hoo, hee hee, the Story dies and the story breathes. Next Tuesday, it will gunk us full of a new truth.
Don’t forget to check out our new short film, “The Dog the Boy”
https://vimeo.com/226796022
Or see it as part of a live TSMBT service:
https://vimeo.com/297286015
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