Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast

In this week's episode, it's an EMT pick! Thank you so much to listener Derek who won the contest in our "Firestarter" episode and chose a real doozy of a film-- the 1988 Satanic cult movie "Hack-O-Lantern." Believe me when I say that this movie has it all: heavy metal, boobs, Satanism, a bathroom with carpet in it which is inherently also very evil, horny adult teens, weird stuff at the rec center, boobs, terrible fake guitar playing in the world's saddest jerkoff fantasy, Levi's cords, creepy grandpas, Coors Light, inept police work, barn-based occult rituals, did we mention boobs? There are a ton of them.

Halloween is THE BEST. You may enjoy Episode 52- Halloween III: Season of the Witch," Episode 68- "Trick r Treat," Episode 105- "Murder Party," Episode 192- "Night of the Demons," Episode 197- "Terrifier," Episode 200- "Trick or Treat," Episode 366- "Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark" and really so many more. It's the most wonderful time of the year.

In this week's episode, we couldn't bring ourselves to watch the old "Firestarter" after the new one was so butt, so we decided to watch...well, something else that's a little bit butt. And a little bit not butt! It's the third entry into the "Final Destination" franchise and if you're wondering if we've covered the second one, the answer is no, of course not. Special topics for your consideration include: the return of elderly teenagers, tanning technology that is absolutely baffling, various facts about various presidents, conspiracy theories, and the fact that death has gotta learn to work smarter, not harder. C'mon fuckin guy.

Want more of the "Final Destination" franchise? We covered the original in Episode 99. More Mary Elizabeth Winstead? Catch her in Episode 303- "Deathproof." Also this movie felt very much like it should have starred Seth Green and it decidedly did not, so go revisit his horror oeuvre in Episode 61- "Krampus," Episode 97- "IT" (the miniseries), and Episode 316- "Idle Hands" and then treat yourself to his finest role in Episode 269- "Can't Hardly Wait."

In this week's episode, we're tackling an in-theaters-now/on-Peacock-now film, the 2022 remake "Firestarter." Yeahhh. Special topics for your consideration include: getting to the bottom of whose fault this is, weed as a personality and also abs as a personality, bad parenting, bad policing, Zap Efron, and our new movie pitch for a film that is destined to fail, even though it stars Rock "The Dwayne" Johnson.

Want more Steven King spooky kids? Obviously you need to be listening to Episode 206- "Carrie." Want more of John Beasley? It's a stretch, I know, but he's the only person in this film who has been in anything else we've done. Apparently he is in Episode 109- "The Purge." Want more Zac Efron? Us either. 

In this week's episode, we're joined by special guest Eli Bosnick of many podcasts but most relevantly "God Awful Movies" to discuss the 2017 found footage Christian horror film "The Lock In." HOO BOY. Special topics for your consideration include: an honest and heartfelt look at the effects of pornography on our culture and-- no, who am I kidding? This is definitely one of our most NSFW episodes in a long time. Come for the BCA (you'll find out...) and stick around until the end to hear a way in which you can win fabulous prizes!

Turns out the Christian right doesn't have a lot of horror chops. You might enjoy some religiously-themed horror movies that are much, much better: Episode 45- "Rosemary's Baby," Episode 73- "The Witch," Episode 77- "The Omen," Episode 155- "The Exorcist, "Episode 206- "Carrie," Episode 270- "Midsommar" or Episode 327- "The Vigil."

Find Eli on "God Awful Movies," "The Scathing Atheist," "The Skepticrat," "D&D Minus," and "Citation Needed," available wherever you listen to us! 

In this week's episode, we're just rolling around in some of our favorite actors to watch: you've got Karen Black, Oliver Reed, Bette Davis, and Burgess Meredith (kinda) in the 1976 creepy film "Burnt Offerings." Special topics for your consideration include: a special message for new listeners, things you can get away with when you're Oliver Reed, hairstyles as a plot device, striving to be like Bette Davis, and a real lack of concern for children's safety in the 70s.

Two of our favorite weird movies that we've covered over the years feature some of these actors. You may enjoy Episode 123- "What Ever Happened to Baby Jane?" and Episode 177- "The Brood." 

In one of the ultimate mood swings from last week's silly fever dream of a movie, this week we're discussing the 2019 psychological horror film "The Lighthouse." Special topics for your consideration include: a lovely production of "Treasure Island," limits to manual labor abilities, a perpetual fear of isolated places, a little chat about art, a little chat about farts, a sprinkling of Greek mythology and of course, dick jokes.

Want more Robert Pattinson? You could listen to our own descents into madness with the "Twilight" series (and we only covered two of them!) The original is Episode 355; "Breaking Dawn Pt. 1" was Episode 359. And please don't even ask when we're doing Part 2 because I am genuinely still not okay from the first half.

In true Werewolf Ambulance fashion, we're skipping the sequel entirely and hurtling towards the conclusion of the "It's Alive" franchise with the third film, "Island of the Alive." Special topics for your consideration include: subpar movie punks, parenting choices one ought not to make, beefcake cops, whatever movie Michael Moriarty thinks he is in, a boat filled with bodies crashing into a marina and the kindness of the Cuban people.

We covered "It's Alive" last week in Episode 376. You may also like the Larry Cohen film "The Stuff," featured in Episode 180. Apparently he also made a movie called "God Made Me Do It" about a half-man/half-alien cult leader so I guess I know what I'm watching tonight!

KILLER BABIES! All killer baby movies are, on some level, pretty batshit. This one takes the cake. We're discussing the 1974 film "It's Alive!" and it is a wild ride. Special topics for your consideration include: a film written from the perspective of absolutely no one, cops who can't hit a baby in a bush, the utter distastefulness of the 70s decor color palette, deadbeat uncles, poker-playing dads-to-be, and the sound of a grown man vomiting.

Do you like murderous tots? Perhaps you'd enjoy Episode 77- "The Omen," Episode 177- "The Brood," and Episode 216- "The Devil Within Her."

Are you a wrestling fan? Are you not a wrestling fan but interested in dipping your toe in the water? Either way, you need to check out the "Renegade" show put on by our friends at Enjoy Wrestling (www.enjoy-wrestling.com.) You can watch weekly episodes on their YouTube channel (in the linktree above) starting May 5 and we think you're going to love it. 

In this week's surprise movie switcheroo, we decided to discuss the 1986 Clive Barker creature film "Rawhead Rex" and WOW is this a movie. Special topics for your consideration include: possibly unintentionally paying homage to another film, the deep-seated fear of not actually being funny, hating your spouse but also jamming your tongue into their mouth whenever possible, terrible parenting, terrible creature design, terrible rocks and terrible baptisms.

We've spent quite a bit of time with ol' Clive. You might enjoy our episodes on other films that he worked on, like  Episode 34- "Candyman," Episode 51- "Hellraiser," Episode 150- "Midnight Meat Train," Episode 205- "Hellbound: Hellraiser II," Episode 262- "Hellraiser: Hellbound," and Episode 320- "Nightbreed."  

Are you a wrestling fan? Are you not a wrestling fan but interested in dipping your toe in the water? Either way, you need to check out the "Renegade" show put on by our friends at Enjoy Wrestling (www.enjoy-wrestling.com.) You can watch weekly episodes on their YouTube channel (in the linktree above) BEGINNING THIS WEEK! New episodes will be released between April 21 and May 5 and we think you're going to love it. 

First of all, apologies because I genuinely can't figure out if the number 5 is included in the film's title. Also, "5cream" or nothing, c'mon guys. Anyway! That's the movie we're talking about, and special topics for your consideration include: having actual feelings about celeb's marriages, a lil bit of Hollywood nepotism, drawing a strong parallel between this film and the other fine film "No Holds Barred," very strong opinions on pizza, and just a modest proposal to all those who make horror movies. 

We've now watched nearly every film in this franchise, and we actually watched the first one first! The original is Episode 44, then we've got "Scre4m" in Episode 228 and "Scr3am" in Episode 278. And just for fun, please enjoy our other works of David Arquette: Episode 93- "Ravenous" and Episode 241- "Buffy the Vampire Slayer."

Do you want to see a truly exceptional indie wrestling event? Last night was the "Renegade" show put on by our friends at Enjoy Wrestling (www.enjoy-wrestling.com.) I personally missed it live and am sad because it looked like a killer time, but am absolutely going to watch it weekly on the their YouTube channel (in the linktree above) between April 21 and May 5. It's the next best thing!